Participant Observation

There is a danger to getting intoxicated, then interacting socially. Especially online. You will say what you mean, and mean what you say. And, thanks to the likes of Google, it is saved forever in the ether. Or in the minds of whoever you were tslking to.

This is a good and bad thing. If you are open and truthful, keeping no secrets, then you will be more so. If you hide behind a mask, and/or keep secrets, then the facade drops, and locks opened. The truth with be revealed.

So the saying "truth in a bottle" holds. At least for me. I have skeletons. And thoughts that really should not see the light of day. Scary. Since most of my social interaction is online. Like this post. Ha.

Rather frightened of what drunk people will say about me. I hide under many layers. Anxiety does that to you. I think, I hope, I am slowly peeling away the layers. Trying to to deal. It is hard. Mind is always cranking up new worst-case scenarios. Grateful for friends. Real ones. The ones that may not understand, but they are there for me anyway. Love them.

I hsve been told that I am a good writer. I guess I have an imagination, sufficient education and life experience, to translate my brain into words. From grade school through college. Even had a professor offer to co-write a book. Still not sure about that. Don't know what to write. Pretty much my life story. "Don't know." "Not sure." "Who am I?" What do I do?"

Crap. What was I trying to say? I forget. Gah! Next stage of my life story. Oldness.

 

Also. Your spelling gets better. You type slower. Just saying.

P.S. There should be an ordinance. Writing under the influence.

P.P.S. This started out intending only to write the 2 paragraphs. What happened?

P.P.P.S. Don't proof under the influence. The letters move, and it's a buzzkill.

Riding it out

You can ride out the storm if you are passionate about what waits for you on the other side.

Keep telling myself that. Yeah...

Remember. Honor. Respect

As I watch the car races, baseball games, playoffs, grilling suggestions, and faces relieved to see a long weekend (happy is good!), I pause to reflect on why we get to to do this. Why we are here. Why we are still here.

We are. A nation of immigrants. Very few get to say they are "native."

We are. Workaholics. We are working, or thinking of work, for much of our waking hours. Even if we don't think we are. Burning our candles at both ends.

We are. A nation that enjoys its pastimes. Many of our highest paid non-Cxx individuals are in the entertainment industry.

We are. Young. Very young, in world history. And we often act like it.

We are. Myopically individualistic. We often don't play well with others.

We are. Entitled. We take things for granted. Someone else will provide. We often think we are owed, demand, instead of continuing to earn our place in the world.

We are. Rich. We have things, as a group, that some others can only dream of.

We are. Paying it forward. Helping the next group move forward. Sometimes, against their wishes. Yeah, have to think about that one.

Yeah. We are pretty out there as a nation.

We are. Very strong when together, very formidable when angered.

We need to remember, always, that we get to do what we do, get to have what we have, because of the "human shield" we have put around ourselves. The shield that pays the price when our liberties are attacked from the outside. That pays the price when our leadership is lacking, and they are starved of what they need to do the job they volunteered for, to put themselves in harms way when the call is made.

Today is the day to remember those that payed the ultimate price.

Not to forget those that have died the "little deaths." Those that are scarred for life, in body and/or soul, be it in battle or by loss of a loved one.

But this day is for those that have died in service of this country. Honor and respect their memory.

And smile. That's what they would have wanted.



Semper Fi. Once and forever.

There is a yawning hole in my soul...

...but perhaps that is meant to be.

Timeout! Go stand in the corner!

Last week was one of those weeks that didn't let up on the triggers, to the point of being extra-chippy. On the advice/cajoling/prodding of a co-worker, I took last 2 days off. It was some time later that I realized that this would be the first extended (read: more than a 3 day weekend) planned time off since a certain event. And the anniversary of that event. So, thank you for the kick in the butt, co-worker friend!

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First day was a holiday. Spent it sleeping, mostly. Yeah, I'm a cheap vacationer. Which is probably a good thing, since I'd probably go overboard and be in forever past retirement debt. Frankly, I've had so little practice taking time off, seems I've forgotten how. I'm not a very spontaneous person, not that "Let's go! Okay!" type. Especially when you're low on "Let's go!" funds. Have to plan my spontaneous moments. Oh, well.

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So, on the fo'real kine first day off, I just did some neighborhood things. Like revisit an old eating place. Took a camera this time. A rather old one. I made ugly pictures with it. Of old places with old signs. But it was interesting to try. The small-kid times memories were good

Oh. When I was shooting the L&L Drive Inn sign, a guy walked by and asked what I was doing. He then did a short history of the place (former Liliha Bakery) and that the odd lot was that way because it used to be the trolley turnaround. Yay for living history lessons/reminders.

L&L Drive Inn, Liliha St, Polaroid 350 Land Camera

Jane's Fountain and Marukin Market, Liliha St, Polaroid 350 Land Camera

Went back to an old neighbor eatery. Been sometime last century, like in the early 80's, that I last went there. Probably a good thing I stayed away, or I may have been recruited by Rod Tam. Oy.

The food was good. Enough that I need to go back and remember some more. Like, I need to work my way through the nabe menu. Crap, I made myself hungry.

Yagura Restaurant, Liliha St, Polaroid 350 Land Camera

(I really do need to practice this photography thing. Bleh.)

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On the second day of my summer vacation...oh, drats. Wrong record. (And if you remember that record, ho brah, you old! Even fo' remember what a record is! Hehe.)

Anyway. I knew that MW Restaurant was now doing $5 small plates menus from 2-5PM. And I've been reminded several times that I should go. Well, I got an invite to try. It's food. At MW. Okay! Hey, what happened to not spontaneous? Hmm.

2pm. I go a little early, because parking is my nemesis. Makes the anxiety meter peg just thinking about it. I even valet, because I hate to find parking. (Da buggah park 3 feet away from me. Ho, slightly futless. But 'ass okay. Smile at da guy, anyway. So he no dent the truck. Even if covered in birdshit.)

Lunch partner shows up. We go in, and are shown our seats. I got the pillar, kinda like my parking at work. And, first time sitting at a table; last 2 times, was at the bars. Stepping up!

Got the menus (3!), and order beverages. She looks at me with disbelieving eyes; I'm not drinking. Yeah, I must be sick in the...somewhere.

Green Tea and Shiso

Chardonnay

Perused the menu. Which is what you have to do, here. Thing about Eurasion food, things are not always what they seem. "That looks good! I think." Check the ingridements; yeah, we can do that. And so on. A thing that made it difficult, for me, was I was HUNGRY. So the stomach wanted EVERYTHING. You know the adage, eyes bigger than the stomach? Fortunately, I wasn't that far gone.

The $5 small plate menu

Got the pickled beet salad off the regular menu. Still good. And actually a good appetizer to wake up the taste buds for what is to follow. It is a pretty intense pickling, so an appropriate beverage pairing is called for.

Pickled Beet Salad

That was quickly followed by the $5 plates. Appetizer-sized. I don't know what you would expect for $5 in a place like this, but I thought it was pretty much in line with the price schedule. Style of food is a matter of taste, but the quality is pretty awesome, no matter what. Fortunately, it was enough for us. Because a dessert was a requirement.

Grilled Waialua Asparagus

Unagi and Butterfish Arancini

Ahi Poke Mandoo

Okay. Fine. 2 desserts. So good. 'nuff said. Okay, maybe one note. I must have made funny face when I  ate the brulee, because she laughed at me. And I didn't care, it was that good!

(Yes, I did blow the candy bar shot. So out of practice. And/Or I was severely distracted by the subject matter. I remember the jitters. Yeah, that's it.)

Meyer Lemon Brulee

MW Candy Bar

We agreed that this was something that we would have to do again. Working through the menu, eventually. But we both are usually working till 4:30PM. May have to coordinate afternoons off...

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The weekend. Nothing special. Normal stuff. So much for that.*sigh*

And so ends this episode. TTFN

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!

As we close 2013, may we put aside the stresses and strains of life and the pursuit of the perfect gift, to take a little time to reflect on what is really important to us.

Family. True friends. Love them fiercely, as there is no more valuable gift.

Merry Christmas, folks. And a Happy and Safe Holidays. See you in 2014!

Normal

This past Thanksgiving, I celebrated by shaving off the end of my thumb with a peeler. Just enough to get below all the skin.

Blood everywhere, but I could staunch the bleeding myself, so no trip to E.R.

But that's not what I'm here about. You see, the section of thumb I lost was rather insignificant, size-wise. Bleeding stopped, life goes on. Right?

Sort of. I no longer have any padding there; the nerves are unprotected. That insignificant little piece of thumb just happened to be where I pick out DVDs from the player. The pressure point when tightening laces. The point where the band sits when tying up my hair. The point that bumps against the dashboard when turning the ignition, or releasing the parking brake. The running point when putting on my underwear. Oops, TMI?

Anyway, seems everything is important, no matter how insignifant it seems. It plays a role that we only realize when it is gone. Pretty much took my thumb out of commission for awhile. Ever go without a thumb? It was on the right hand. Acute realization how right hand-centric our clothes are. Buttoning and zipping without a right thumb Go ahead and try.

It is scabbing over now, and new padding is slowly growing in. Not nearly as thick as it used to be. That section is still visibly...flat. I am adjusting to life without this formerly insignificant piece of flesh that was once a part of me. And I miss it. Sorry for taking you for granted, little guy. You were important to me.

Can't even imagine what those that lose whole body parts go through. So, belatedly, I am thankful for still being whole. It's a new normal. 

Monkey Bread!!!

 Was informed by the fabulous Roni that we HAD to make this wonderful monkey bread recipe that the Pioneer Woman posted. With revisions. Like using 2 Grands instead of 3 of the regular biscuits. And add chopped pecans. And add some of the dusting sugar to the butter. Zero-calorie treat, right? Holy moley...

Well, being sick in the head, I stayed out today. And quickly got bored. Since I wasn't contagious, I went shopping, quick-kine. And...they didn't have Grands! Oh no, stuck! But they did have those Cinnabon Grands. This recipe has cinnamon. And sugar. Instant recipe revision revision! And I decided to use chopped macadamia nuts instead of pecans. We're in Hawaii, right? And I have people that don't like pecans. Oh, well.

Anyway, put everything together as directed by everybody, and it came out like this:

Smelled so good! Waited the prescribed 30 minutes, and dumped it out on a plate. Required in-your-face shot:

Then I added a little of the cream cheese Cinnabon frosting to a quarter of the pile:

 Holy crap. That is some awesome stuff. Especially warm. The cream cheese frosting is really sweet, so definitely optional. Maybe on the side for dipping.

Thank yous to Ree Drummond  and Ms. Roni! Ono kau-kau!

A Happy Thanksgiving 2013!

Ah. I wasn't going to do this

post. Then some things happened that made me rethink that position.

So. I am thankful for my family, and everything that means. That I have a job. That I have a roof over my head, and food in my tummy.

I am grateful for the opportunity to be there for people. And my closest friends.

I am thankful to those that put their lives on the line so that I have the freedom to live as I do, at the possible expense of their own personal freedoms.

And I am thankful to still have my thumb, in spite of myself. So far.

Hope you all had or are having a happy and safe Thanksgiving!

Peace, all.

Oh, Dear. It's almost Thanksgiving...

...and it seems I've disappeared.

Quick catch-up. Nothing is happening. That's actually a good thing, in my case.

Although, one of my sore points is getting freakin' itchy, and I don't think scratching is going to do anything about it. However, I am learning, slowly, bit by bit, to ignore it. Yes, it is still there, but I am learning to deal.

I will probably explode at some point, but that time is not now. Not yet. I have a personal mission that I must see through. Once that is done, whatever happens, happens.

Until then, keep laughing. Right.

I'll think of something to be thankful for, later. Really.

Toodles.