Small-kine Status update

I had a sign yesterday that the body is not as "haddit" as it could be; I experienced a "normal" at-rest blood-pressure reading (averaged across 3) of 112/68. So the body is okay and capable of "normal." Just need a head transplant; make the neck bolts pretty, please.

For you regular/healthy people, this may be a "so what?" thing. For me, I haven't seen that low a reading in decades, so I am a bit excited. Of course, I woke up this morning with the usual "Ah cr*p, I have to go to work" reading :p My doctor will probably give me "the look" when he sees the June log readings, haha >.<

In other news:
Nikki Jennifer Photography is continuing their 2nd Anniversary Celebration with the Week #2 Giveaway. If you haven't done so, check it  out at the blog. If you meet the terms of the "fine print" (it is location-specific), please give it a shot. And keep up; it's a 4 week celebration, with a new week opening on Monday, and winner(s) announced Sunday evening; may wish to bookmark that blog link above. And there is a ticker on the response; don't respond in time, then a new winner will be selected (Please don't make her do that! It make's her sad! And more work!). Good luck!

Nikki Jennifer Photography's Anniversary Celebration Giveaway has begun!

Nikki Jennifer Photography's Anniversary Celebration has begun, Week 1! And it's a pretty sweet one to start with; a gift certificate from Fighting Eel!

Go to her Blog, get to the Week 1 post. Read. Follow directions. We're all literate adults, right? Hope so, because disappointments due to not a paying attention are so...disappointing. :(

Note the dates! Note the limitations! Note the opportunities! Go get'em!

Nikki Jennifer Photography Giveaway Week 1

Almost here: Nikki Jennifer Photography is ramping up the celebration!

Nikki Jennifer Photography is turning 2! Still a very young small business, and this amazing natural light photographer has survived another year! And to celebrate, she is running a 4 week Giveaway for her supporters. Head on over to her blog for details.

Note: be sure to follow directions. Note the disclaimers. Note the location! Leave comments at the the post. And be sure to follow her blog! Follow her Facebook Page for good measure! Most importantly, it is all fun. Be sure to take in that spirit.

Hurry! Giveaway starts this week (week of June 18)! Good luck! Have fun!

Memorial Day: Remember

 

Remembering those that made the ultimate sacrifice defending the rights and freedoms we too often take for granted.

Towel Day, and things less fun

 

It's Towel Day 2012! For some reason, as much as I love the writings of the late Douglas Adams and "Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy," I never bothered to celebrate Intergalactic Towel Day (May 25). I shall remedy that oversight, starting today.

I should also reread the series. I seem to have forgotten a lot of details. If I see white mice scurrying away, however, I think I should be worried.

On a little less fun note

[start rant]

Keep seeing this question come up, mostly for others. "I love your photography. What kind of  camera and lens do you have?" Does it really matter? C'mon, the photographer is an artist, a light painter. The camera and lens are his/her brushes, which the artist uses to execute their vision.

You don't ask a chef what kind of stove they use. You don't ask a painter what kind of brushes they use. You don't ask a carpenter what kind of hammers they use. It shouldn't matter to you. The only thing that matters is the quality of the delivered product, be it food, a painting, a structure or a photograph. If you have a stove, it does not make you a chef. If you have brushes, it does not make you a painter. If you have a hammer, it does not make you a carpenter. If you own a camera, it does not make you a photographer.

If you want a photographer to take your picture/portrait, you tell them what look you want. If they can accommodate your  requirements, and you can come to an agreement to terms, you may proceed. What equipment they use or technique employed is their job, not yours. You like their art, let them do their art for you; that is what you're paying for. Your job is to enjoy the experience and the delivered product. And pay their rates; it's carefully calculated to include the work it takes to get you what you see in the end. Don't want to pay their rate? Find someone else, but remember, you get what you pay for. If you think you can do it better, that is fine; do it yourself.

Oh. And please do not ask the photographer to lie with Photoshop or other  post-processing techniques. They will do their best to bring out the best in you; your job is to bring the best you to work with.

Unless it's Mom. The photographer's Mom always gets a free pass. May get some eye-rolls, but "thy will be done."

Disclaimer: I am a camera owner. Obscenely large investment for a non-professional. It does not  give me the right to dictate to a photographer how they should work. If I wish to have my portrait taken, I will select the appropriate photographer whose style I like and find appropriate to myself, pay them their rate, get out of the way, and attempt to enjoy the process of having my visage captured.

[end rant]

TTFN...

(edit: related post > Professional photographers: they are people trying to make a living, like the rest of us)

Rain, windows, updates.

Things are a little better with me; I am handling adverse encounters a little better, recovery times are improving. Still reacting, still popping, still need to sit down and center. Often. More work required.

Interesting week.  Getting back into the work groove, getting my head around issues the way they need to be dealt with. Unfortunately, it is that time of year when the craziness is extra-compressed and urgent. Everyone at work is on tippy-toes, they are so high-strung. And me in the middle of this trying to avoid that; *sigh.*

Due to my schedule being involuntarily pushed back, I am in the midst of rushing testing to determine feasibility of different options, depending on how much money we don't have, including benefits and consequences of the different scenarios. Loathe that; goes against my need to plan things out. And because there are too many loose ends, the anxiety level goes up. But this needs to be done.

On a more positive note, I had the opportunity to help a dear friend, one that has become a soul-sister (if those still exist) to me, to try some personal work get her creative juices going, and find her "happy place." No pressure to produce. Seeing the joy on her face, "watching" the mind at work seeing the possibilities and the creativity that is flowing is actually helping my own healing process. Between that and finally getting her to meet another friend in real life for the first time (been working on this one for awhile), and them hitting it off. So awesome. Working on the rest of her family; I get to be mento-uncle, hehe...

Major warm-fuzzies. Yes, that dates me. And sometimes, "I'm okay, you're okay."

I leave you with a new in old-kine style, kinda bassup looking picture of the top the the Honolulu Civic Center, from the window of my temporary work space. It was a nice day, that day. Now, stay raining. But rain is good. Yes.

ttfn...

Professional photographers: they are people trying to make a living, like the rest of us

From a professional photographer friend:

If there's one thing I could tell everyone about what I do, it's that it's NOT easy money. Yes it's fun- when I get a wonderful family who loves each other and invests the time and energy in making their session theirs. But what my clients see is only a fraction of all the work involved- countless hours responding to inquiries via email and phone before booking (I book about 20% of my inquiries, which is about the right number of sessions for full time work), editing the images shown in the client's gallery (as a perfectionist I am always editing!), placing and delivering orders and doing followup.

I do love what I do- it's incredible to be able to capture the first moments in a new family's life, and witness the bond of a parents and child in a tender moment. But no, I don't photograph my own kids often enough (and they are usually OVER being photographed before I begin!), I don't get to spend all my time with them, and I can't "leave my work at work". My prices aren't arbitrary, they're set based on what I need to earn- after taxes, insurance, equipment, supplies, and cost of goods- to pay for the mortgage and childcare. - Lisa Hoang

Folks, just because someone has a fancy camera does not mean they should be considered a photographer. They are 'camera owners.' I still consider myself a camera owner, aspiring (wishing, wannabe) to be a 'photographer.' To be a professional photographer is a whole 'nother level on top of that; it is a lot of planning, preparation, HARD WORK, follow-up, marketing, advertising, paying fees, taxes... sound familiar? They are business owners; they WORK. Hard. On top of that, they have to take your pictures, too! They pay attention to the details; minutiae can all ruin an otherwise wonderful image.

When a professional photographer quotes you a price, it is a fair deal, factoring in all the costs that go into that quote. If they allow "a la carte" pricing, that can be a great deal; accept it if it works out for you. If the deal seems to be a "too good to be true," it probably is; be careful. In this business, you get what you pay for. Put another way: before you try to bargain your way to a lower rate, consider your answer if someone asked if you would work for less pay. Same thing.

Passion drives these people. The professionals in this business pride themselves on delivering a quality product; their pride will allow no less. If they turn you down as a client, it is because they do not feel they can deliver the product you are looking for at the quality they demand of themselves. There is no such thing as "good enough."

Being a professional means they will deliver what you contract them for; they will do you right. Do your part; pay the rate you agreed upon, with the expectations you signed for. If you have any questions, please ask them BEFORE you sign the contract. And do NOT assume anything; this only leads to misunderstandings and hard feelings. Leave nothing to interpretation; they understand that contracts are scary, and should be happy to explain everything to your satisfaction. It's a part of being professional and a business person.

Oh. Unless you stipulate otherwise in the contract, the photographer owns the copyright to all the images. This is U.S. copyright law. Please do not demand that they hand over the high-quality images without appropriate compensation; it will be very steep. DO expect to pay for quality prints; printing is a complicated thing, and they will ensure you will get the best quality print for the size(s) you want.

Now, go find yourself a quality professional photographer that will deliver what you are looking for. Most importantly, have fun; they love that!

So, why bother with a blog?

"I wish I kept a journal.  I want so badly to remember the last normal day I had." - Jen Ozawa

Anyone that is following Jen and Ryan Ozawa's blogging of her current ordeal know these words. Amazingly powerful opening line to a post. And Ryan's post today highlights how hard, but important, it is do continue doing so, with focus.

What does this have to do with me? Well, I have recently had that "life's elbow in the ribs" moment. No where near what the Ozawas are going through, but enough to make me stop and think.

I am guilty of having put off any kind of journaling of my life "to tomorrow." Frankly, I don't think I'm interesting enough to record. But it is MY life, however boring. Watching how others journal their lives, whether through a blog, Facebook, Flickr, now Google+, even Twitter... I am still not comfortable speaking about myself. I am definitely too, um, verbose, to go 140 characters at a time, though.

---

 
Catching up & Catharsis

The Event. So. It seems I am a head case. Had an event a little over a month ago. Thought it was a cold, frankly. A little dizzy, occasional cough. Fine; stay home, it will clear up and life is normal. Whatever that is.

But it never quite went away; seemed to get better, went to work, got worse, out again. For days. Rinse, repeat. Then, there was that incident where, I am at work standing in front of my co-workers, and they basically tell me I look like shit. Which pretty much matched how I felt, including the tummy doing flip-flops, a near "white-out" and the body and limbs are buzzing. Agreed that it was time to go. Interesting that the further away from work I got, the better I felt.

3 days later (Friday), I find myself at the Queen's emergency room with a rather high (is 208/115 high?) blood pressure, and they can't get it to come down. EKG indicated that I have been under duress for some time; just a little thickening of the left ventricle. Blood tests showed no markers of a heart attack. CAT scan (I have confirmed the existence of a brain-like object in my skull) showed no problems. Admitted that night. Getting blood thinners as belly shots, and not the fun kind; yellow splotches and firmness all over the belly fat for a week. Taking meds to keep the blood pressure down. "Get some rest. Oh, we'll be poking and prodding every 5 hours. Got to sleep." Oh, hey. Have to say. The floor staff at Queen's was awesome. Friendly, knowledgeable, attentive. Freakin; busy, but stopped to answer all your questions, within bounds. Forwarded stuff they couldn't answer to the attending physician. Big mahalo to them.

Attending physician wants to "blow the pipes" (induced stress test) to be sure there are no blockages, but it is the Kuhio Day weekend, and that lab is closed until Tuesday. Which kinda worked out, because I got myself worked up and they wouldn't have released me at that time, anyway. Induced stress. A "fasting" procedure; no caffeine for 24 hours, nothing by mouth after midnight. So glad she asked for that, since I don't think a treadmill would have been good at that time. Tracer and picture-taking aside, the procedure felt a lot like that incident; monster body flush, buzzing, tummy doing flip-flops; hey, I've felt this before. If I had eaten, the floor would have been a mess.

In the end, I am physically fine. My "at rest" vitals are a touch high, my cholesterol is not bad, blood sugars are fine. But my stress ("fight or flight") response seems to be on a hair-trigger and amp'd up. Annoyances, aggravation, getting lectured at, being argumentative (oh, oh!); apathy, ignorance, stupidity are my "hot buttons," and some people push them all without trying. I have to learn to control the trigger; the doc recommended a book, "The Relaxation Response" by Herbert Benson, M.D.


Dr. Benson is a cardiologist by practice, but explored alternatives to pumping drugs into patients for problems that patients may be able to address themselves. Boy, the pharmaceutical companies must be pissed at him. Anyway, it's the transcendental meditation variation to try and get you  to exert control over your body. A decent try at writing, but I don't find it interesting enough to hold my attention. Still, the concepts make sense, and I need to find a way to incorporate them into my lifestyle.


Lifestyle. Well, I am currently on maintenance meds, to hopefully cap my blood pressure from bursting through the roof. It still gets high, and I am learning to listen to my body, to feel the difference between a stress-response and exertion. No problems with exertion, by the way. Long walks are not an issue, once I get off my fat lazy ass. I am (hopefully) getting better at dealing with my stress response; not autonomous, and it take awhile, but I can force it back down. But I haven't faced my "demon," yet; my co-workers know what I am talking about. Soon. It  will tell me where I am in the recovery process. Yes, the big trigger is at work. And it's not as simple as "well, quit then!." Which is another part of the problem; feeling trapped. Still looking over options, and my employer has been gracious in extending help. Thank you.

Originally posted at the Todd Maeda Photography
Facebook Page

Photography. Pretty much at a standstill. The D|SLR has not left the house for over a month. Do try some puttering with lighting, or found things, but nothing serious. It has been smartphone work. *sigh*


Something that I need to get back into. Clears the head of the cobwebs and b/s at work. Maybe use the time to assess where I am in this rather expensive hobby of mine. Time to figure out what I have, and how to best utilize them. Time to figure out what MY photography is. Not someone else's perception of what my photography SHOULD be.

Food (versus Lifestyle). Food is important to me. Not in the "I'm hungry" mindset, though; I can eat one meal in a day and actually be okay with it (wonder if that's a problem.). I'm a "Live to Eat" type. But these recent events may put a little bit of a damper on the amount of that activity I may indulge in. You see, I am NOT on a dietary restriction. However, it is RECOMMENDED that I look at a lower sodium/heart-friendly diet. Um, a lot of that is "flavor." Not "salty;" that's actually a junk flavor. But salt, properly used, is a flavor enhancer. Like fat is a flavor transport. Thanks to a note dropped on me by a Facebook friend, no all is lost. I do prefer sea salt; living in Hawaii, it is my salt of choice. So happens that I can get my "salt" without adding as much sodium, Yay! But everything in moderation, so I need to to watch for times of high salt intake, and balance that. And water. Oh lordy, I feel like I slosh, now.


Alcohol! It's a food group, right? I've had one shot in 5 weeks. Sadness. Again, not a restriction, just a nod to a warning. Well, I generally don't drink to get drunk, so that is good. But I need to watch out for when I do choose to drink.

---

 

So. Where am I? Possibly still lost, and wondering if I can keep this up. I lack things to say, unless I am talking about others. Maybe promote what others are doing. Maybe I need to start baking again.

Staycation comes to an end...

(Wow, has it been so long since I last posted?)

So my 1+ week of "stay-cation" comes to a close.

Started out with an awesome, joyful, busy(!) and blustery celebration, helping a dear friend (finally!) get married to her best friend. She planned it all, and it all came together wonderfully.

Spent the rest of the time trying really hard to ignore work; thoughts intruded, but I'm resisted reading the e-mail that has backed on me. This is a bit of a trial, to see if I can do this. Not work during vacation. I need more practice, as I am feeling the tension of going back.

The rain we have been anticipating has moved in. Tomorrow is going to suck big ones...

Beware this person

Beware of the person posting images on the Web under the moniker of

rockstar8x (Facebook page is currently being reported. Repeatedly)


working out of Vietnam. He is known to take images of children, and claim them as his own. How do I know this? He had the misfortune of using the picture (2, actually) of a child of a personal friend. Love that child, and knowing that his image is being used in such a manner is INFURIATING!!!!


Can we suspect this person as a child-porn suspect? Please? Stealing pictures of children is...sick!

Please help. Trying really hard to calm down an irate mother...